MasterChef season 10

Let the contest begin!

Rules:

Pick 1 keeper and 2 losers. Gain a point for each loser that leaves the show. Lose a point for each keeper that leaves the show.

You can pick anyone you want at the start of each show.

In the future, as agreed, if rules emerge, then we may update rules as agreed before the start of the episode.

If Mike wins, Dan endures an hour of Blender pair programming hell. If Dan wins, Mike sets him up a quick website with authentication.

UPDATE: Mike is a pussy who got tired of endless entrails of wasted animals and bailed out. Sorry, these “world class chefs” are Julia Child era dinosaurs.

APE-RONS
Bri Baker, Dallas, Texas, Cocktail Server
Dorian Hunter, Cartersville, Ga., Creeler
Fred Chang, Redondo Beach, Calif., Revenue Analyst
Jamie Hough, Charleston, S.C., Fisherman
Micah Yaroch, Grand Rapids, Mich., Kitchen Porter
Nick DiGiovanni, Barrington, R.I., College Student
Noah Sims, Epworth, Ga., Septic Systems Foreman
Renee Rice, Ada, Okla., Receptionist
Sam Haaz, Philadelphia, Pa., Attorney
Sarah Faherty, San Diego, Calif., Former Army Interrogator
Shari Mukherjee, Rochester, Minn., Stay-at-Home Mom
Subha Ramiah, West Nyack, N.Y., R&D Director
Wuta Onda, Bronx, N.Y., English Teacher
APE-ROFFS
Deanna Colón, Simi Valley, Calif., Vocal Coach (3)
Kenny Palazzolo, Boston, Mass., Carpenter (3)
Kimberly White, New York, N.Y., Shoe Designer (5)
Evan Tesiny, Brooklyn, N.Y., Sales Coordinator (7)
Liz Linn, Durand, Mich., Events Consultant (9)
Michael Silverstein, Pittsburgh, Pa., Real Estate Flipper (9)
Keturah King, London, England, Freelance Writer (11)
ScoreDan winDan loseMike winMike loseEliminatedDanMike
Ep1+22020
Ep3 2020
Ep4+5 2020
Ep6+7 2120
Ep8+9

2120
Ep10+11






2120
Ep12+13





9.0 The Mandalorian

I have plenty of shade to throw at The Mandalorian. Specifically, at my old pal Jon Favreau for being such an obsessed douchebag carnivore. But you will not find, anywhere in present or past, anything, that has ever LOOKED so good! The background scenery has been optimized with an Unreal screen ring, and the foreground is inside the ring, lit to perfection. Nothing ever before has delivered such beautiful pixels … just … so satisfying to see…

9.0 Black Monday seasons 1-2

The blackest of 80s comedy, drenched in every terrible glorious cultural reference from bad hair to bad movies to bad music, with a stock market theme full of back stabbers and pedal-to-the-medal ribald punchlines. Like a mashup of Billions, Arrested Development, Veep, Wolf of Wall Street and In Living Color. Silly crazy rude fun.

Spy Games Season 1 contest

Dan and I have the Covid Blues so we are scraping for any reality races on which we can bet. Any show where each episode has a winner and a loser. Here’s our next train wreck! Call your bookie, slap down those bets!

New improved rules, now with more action!

  • Pick the player you think will win, pick the two players you think will be chosen to defend themselves, and pick the player you think will be actually eliminated.
  • For winners, start with 10 points. If your winner is eliminated, you lose a point, and you have to pick another. If your winner wins, you score a point, and they remain your pick.
  • For losers, start with 0 points. Score a point for each defender you got right. If your loser is eliminated, you score a point, and get to pick another.
  • Contest winner is the one with the most points after the final episode!
  • Also, we are playing with DAN’S BASTARDIZATION OF THE PICK RULES: you can change any pick you want in between episodes. WHAT? LAME, Mike does not approve… but he’s very accommodating, so here we go…
STILL BREATHING
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori
Chelsey Mori

Raffle
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson
Brock Thompson

Clone
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall
Christina Randall

Cheek
FUCKING OUT
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif Kareem
Saif Kareem
Iran
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch Abrams
Dr. Mitch Abrams
Shots
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica Studnicky
Jessica Studd
Emo
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright
Charnel Wright
Buff
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour
Nika Nour
Plank
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Colin Hutzler
In-And-Out
Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson
George Jackson
Loser

RESULTS

Winner(the rest)Defender + Loser
Ep01Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif Kareem Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica Studnicky Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch Abrams
Ep02Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica Studnicky Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika NourSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif Kareem
Ep03Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika NourSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica Studnicky
Ep04Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright
Ep05Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour
Ep06N/ASpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler
Ep07N/ASpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson
Ep08

WIN PICKS

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08
DanSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif KareemSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori
MikeSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori
WinnerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock ThompsonN/AN/A

DEFENDER PICKS

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08
DanSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallN/A
MikeSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica Studnicky Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin Hutzler Spy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Brock Thompson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallN/A
DefendersSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel Wright Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif KareemSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica StudnickySpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina Randall Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika Nour Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey Mori Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George Jackson Spy Games Season 1 Headshot Chelsey MoriN/A

LOSE PICKS

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08
DanSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Christina RandallN/A
MikeSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonN/A
LoserSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Dr Mitch AbramsSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Saif KareemSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Jessica StudnickySpy Games Season 1 Headshot Charnel WrightSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Nika NourSpy Games Season 1 Headshot Colin HutzlerSpy Games Season 1 Headshot George JacksonN/A

SCORE

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08
Dan14 PERFECT!141317 PERFECT!191819
Mike12121213131314

The Future (thank you Elon)

  • Global fleet of autonomous-driving taxis (no more parking lots, traffic, pollution, car payments, crashes… you won’t grok this for a while, but Now You Know was there to warn you…)
  • Global near-instantaneous internet (Starlink internet-via-vacuum is 40% faster than fiber; again, you’ve been warned…); this alone will be lucrative enough to fund all Elon’s plans
  • Utopian Mars with a self-governed, self-sustaining, and industrious population, nonstop direct (rocket) flights, and fast-as-light communications network
  • Coming much sooner than you think to a planet near you…

Amazing Race 32 contest

Yes it’s still going strong! Dan pointed out that season 32 was coming up, and we are all in on another round of betting! How old is Phil now, anyway? He looks exactly the same.

  • Pick the team you think will win, and pick the team you think will be eliminated next.
  • For winners, start with 11 points. If your winning team is eliminated, you lose a point, and you have to pick another.
  • For losers, start with 0 points. If your losing team is eliminated, you score a point, and get to pick another.
  • Contest winner is the one with the most points after the final episode!

Winner gets a prize! TBD, ha. Also:
If Dan wins, Mike hauls his shit to the dumpster.
If Mike wins, he gets a TOP SHELF VO from Danno.


Coach & Son
Jerry & Frank

Glasses
Leo & Alana

Purple
Will & James

Orphans
​Kaylynn and Haley

Olympians
Kellie & LaVonne

Fucking Smart
Eswar & Aparna

Parents
Hung & Chee

Volleyballers
Riley & Maddison

Footballers
DeAngelo & Gary

Cajun Asians
Michelle & Victoria

Catfishers
Nathan & Cody

RESULTS

Ep01
Ep02
Ep03
Ep04 N/A
Ep05
Ep06 N/A
Ep07
Ep08
Ep09
Ep10

WIN PICKS

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08Ep09Ep10
Dan
Mike
Larry
Jane
Winner

LOSE PICKS

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08Ep09Ep10
Dan
Mike
Larry
Jane
LoserN/AN/A

SCORE

Ep01Ep02Ep03Ep04Ep05Ep06Ep07Ep08Ep09Ep10
Dan11111111111111
Mike11121313131313
Larry111111111111
Jane111111111112