MasterChef season 10

March 6, 2021March 26, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Let the contest begin!

Rules:

Pick 1 keeper and 2 losers. Gain a point for each loser that leaves the show. Lose a point for each keeper that leaves the show.

You can pick anyone you want at the start of each show.

In the future, as agreed, if rules emerge, then we may update rules as agreed before the start of the episode.

If Mike wins, Dan endures an hour of Blender pair programming hell. If Dan wins, Mike sets him up a quick website with authentication.

UPDATE: Mike is a pussy who got tired of endless entrails of wasted animals and bailed out. Sorry, these “world class chefs” are Julia Child era dinosaurs.

9.0 Think Like A Man

January 17, 2021January 17, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Another retro ensemble making me happy. Has my fave girls from Person of Interest (Taraji Penda Henson) AND Black Monday (Regina Hall). And Kevin Hart tearing it up. Silly romcom but never slows down. Hey there’s J. B. Smoove, too!

8.5 Things You Can Tell Just By Looking At Her

January 16, 2021January 16, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

My obsession with old ensemble movies with killer casts continues… This melancholy gem captured the depth of a host of unique female characters across half a dozen intermingled story lines. Cameron Diaz and Calista Flockhart brought their A games, as Holly Hunter always does.

9.0 The Mandalorian

January 15, 2021January 15, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

I have plenty of shade to throw at The Mandalorian. Specifically, at my old pal Jon Favreau for being such an obsessed douchebag carnivore. But you will not find, anywhere in present or past, anything, that has ever LOOKED so good! The background scenery has been optimized with an Unreal screen ring, and the foreground is inside the ring, lit to perfection. Nothing ever before has delivered such beautiful pixels … just … so satisfying to see…

9.0 Black Monday seasons 1-2

January 14, 2021January 14, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

The blackest of 80s comedy, drenched in every terrible glorious cultural reference from bad hair to bad movies to bad music, with a stock market theme full of back stabbers and pedal-to-the-medal ribald punchlines. Like a mashup of Billions, Arrested Development, Veep, Wolf of Wall Street and In Living Color. Silly crazy rude fun.

Spy Games Season 1 contest

November 26, 2020January 15, 2021 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Dan and I have the Covid Blues so we are scraping for any reality races on which we can bet. Any show where each episode has a winner and a loser. Here’s our next train wreck! Call your bookie, slap down those bets!

New improved rules, now with more action!

Pick the player you think will win, pick the two players you think will be chosen to defend themselves, and pick the player you think will be actually eliminated.
For winners, start with 10 points. If your winner is eliminated, you lose a point, and you have to pick another. If your winner wins, you score a point, and they remain your pick.
For losers, start with 0 points. Score a point for each defender you got right. If your loser is eliminated, you score a point, and get to pick another.
Contest winner is the one with the most points after the final episode!
Also, we are playing with DAN’S BASTARDIZATION OF THE PICK RULES: you can change any pick you want in between episodes. WHAT? LAME, Mike does not approve… but he’s very accommodating, so here we go…

	STILL BREATHING
Chelsey Mori Raffle	Brock Thompson Clone	Christina Randall Cheek
	FUCKING OUT
Saif Kareem Iran	Dr. Mitch Abrams Shots	Jessica Studd Emo
Charnel Wright Buff	Nika Nour Plank	Colin Hutzler In-And-Out
George Jackson Loser

RESULTS

	Winner	(the rest)	Defender + Loser
Ep01
Ep02
Ep03
Ep04
Ep05
Ep06	N/A
Ep07	N/A
Ep08

WIN PICKS

	Ep01	Ep02	Ep03	Ep04	Ep05	Ep06	Ep07	Ep08
Dan
Mike
Winner						N/A	N/A

DEFENDER PICKS

	Ep01	Ep02	Ep03	Ep04	Ep05	Ep06	Ep07	Ep08
Dan								N/A
Mike								N/A
Defenders								N/A

LOSE PICKS

	Ep01	Ep02	Ep03	Ep04	Ep05	Ep06	Ep07	Ep08
Dan								N/A
Mike								N/A
Loser								N/A

SCORE

	Ep01	Ep02	Ep03	Ep04	Ep05	Ep06	Ep07	Ep08
Dan	14 PERFECT!	14	13	17 PERFECT!	19	18	19
Mike	12	12	12	13	13	13	14

The Future (thank you Elon)

November 3, 2020November 3, 2020 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Global fleet of autonomous-driving taxis (no more parking lots, traffic, pollution, car payments, crashes… you won’t grok this for a while, but Now You Know was there to warn you…)
Global near-instantaneous internet (Starlink internet-via-vacuum is 40% faster than fiber; again, you’ve been warned…); this alone will be lucrative enough to fund all Elon’s plans
Utopian Mars with a self-governed, self-sustaining, and industrious population, nonstop direct (rocket) flights, and fast-as-light communications network
Coming much sooner than you think to a planet near you…

Does anyone even care any more?

November 3, 2020November 4, 2020 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

9.0 The Informer

October 26, 2020October 26, 2020 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Two of my favorites bring it home. Common and Ana de Armas are in it, too.

Amazing Race 32 contest

October 19, 2020November 26, 2020 ~ m ~ Leave a comment

Yes it’s still going strong! Dan pointed out that season 32 was coming up, and we are all in on another round of betting! How old is Phil now, anyway? He looks exactly the same.

Pick the team you think will win, and pick the team you think will be eliminated next.
For winners, start with 11 points. If your winning team is eliminated, you lose a point, and you have to pick another.
For losers, start with 0 points. If your losing team is eliminated, you score a point, and get to pick another.
Contest winner is the one with the most points after the final episode!

Winner gets a prize! TBD, ha. Also:
If Dan wins, Mike hauls his shit to the dumpster.
If Mike wins, he gets a TOP SHELF VO from Danno.

RESULTS

WIN PICKS

LOSE PICKS

SCORE

	Ep01	Ep02	Ep03	Ep04	Ep05	Ep06	Ep07	Ep08	Ep09	Ep10
Dan	11	11	11	11	11	11	11
Mike	11	12	13	13	13	13	13
Larry	–	11	11	11	11	11	11
Jane	–	11	11	11	11	11	12

Coach & Son Jerry & Frank	Glasses Leo & Alana	Purple Will & James
Orphans Kaylynn and Haley	Olympians Kellie & LaVonne	Fucking Smart Eswar & Aparna
Parents Hung & Chee	Volleyballers Riley & Maddison	Footballers DeAngelo & Gary
Cajun Asians Michelle & Victoria	Catfishers Nathan & Cody

Score	Dan win	Dan lose	Mike win	Mike lose	Eliminated	Dan	Mike
Ep1+2	—		—		—	20	20
Ep3						20	20
Ep4+5						20	20
Ep6+7						21	20
Ep8+9						21	20
Ep10+11						21	20
Ep12+13